3am

Aptly named blog post, it's 3am here and I'm up... Why might you ask? I don't know really. I just got home... although I wasn't out all night I actually just stepped out for a few hours.. First time I've left the house at 1am to go out... but anyways.. more than that I've noticed I have a lot of free time. A lot more than I felt I would. Anyways, I think that I've been going about life in the entirely wrong way. I've been trying to actively pursue things and make things happen in my life. Although my attitude and how I carry myself would say otherwise... I've come to the realization that if I were to have anything happen... I can't force it. I need to just take it as it is, if things do happen then they happen. If not, then nothing in the world I do will make it happen. Not really an Earth shattering revelation but it's my little epiphany if you will. One of many I've had in recent weeks. There's something to be said about everything that's been going on in my life. I think it's leading me down a path I never really would have taken or thought about going down and I'm not sure if it's a path that is good or bad yet as I've only begun this next phase of my life.

Will I have more 3am blogs? More likely than not I will... but in any event things will be as they are for the time being and of changes in my life. I can't foresee anything big happening. Maybe? Christmas miracles still happen, but I'm not really in need of anything this Christmas. I just want my friends to be happy. Not the superficial, I'm fine, or I'm good. But I want all of my friends and loved ones to feel sincere joy and happiness in their lives. I think that's my biggest wish in life. Is for those around me that I love, family and friends... is for them all to just have all their troubles seem insignificant or gone. I know I can't influence things like this but maybe, I'll change things. One problem, one worry, one stress, and come up with solutions. One person at a time.